Funny Stuff

Funny Christmas One-Liners, Jokes and Humor


What is special about the Christmas alphabet?
It has NO EL.

What happens if you eat the Christmas decorations?
You get tinsel-itus!

Why does Santa have 3 gardens?
He likes to ho-ho-ho.

santa

How does Santa Claus take photos?
With his North Pole-aroid.

What did Adam say on the day before Christmas?
It's Christmas, Eve.

Why are Christmas trees like people who can't knit?
They both drop their needles!

Which reindeer needs to mind his manners the most?
"Rude"olph!

What do you call a group of chess fanatics bragging about their games in a hotel lobby?
Chess nuts boasting in an open foyer!

What do you call a cat on the beach at Christmas?
Sandy Claus!

What do you call a reindeer wearing ear muffs?
Anything you want. He can't hear you!

santa on skis

Mum, Can I have a dog for Christmas?
No, you can have turkey like everyone else!

Why didn't the skeleton go to the Christmas Party?
He had no body to go with!

Why did the little boy push his bed into the fireplace?
He wanted to sleep like a log.


Check out these funny christmas songs!

What decoration do you prefer? Santa and a Snowman or the wonderful Jim Shore Figurines?

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